So, I didn't make it home on time tonight for a five o'clock pre-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving dinner so I'm all alone at home, just me and my computer. BTW, who the hell schedules a dinner at 5:00? With nothing better to do, I thought I'd sort through my gobs of music files. Right now I'm listening to the The Echoing Green. Joey is amazing. Here's a taste:
Lyrics
Flame (Joey B., Chrissy J.)
It's a dark and lonely winter
you say "this hell's never felt so cold."
yet there's the faintest smell of cinders
and a truth yet to be told
and a sound surrounds your secret
someting I've heard, but can't yet see
like whispers in the twilight
the secret now revealed to me...
it's a flame...
burning just behind your eyes
I'm praying for rain
but nothing will put out these fires
that burn and blaze
wait
let's not forsake all these years
if you'd just stay...
there's so much truth still to hear
and I'll listen all night
to your hopes and every fear
I won't say it's alright...
these things always end in tears.
you're fanning the flame
and everything is catching fire
the things that you hate
and everything that you desire...
are one and the same.
running to escape this pyre
and cover the shame
hiding just behind your eyes
through green and grey.
we turn turn with hearts on fire
we feel it inside, we're steeling to die
to burn burn what we conspire
we cast it aside, to keep us alive
there's a flame
the things that you hate
the tears that you taste
we burn it away
there's a flame.
Friday, November 13, 2009
Sunday, August 2, 2009
This Week's Conference Schedule
I just finished packing and scheduling all of my time for this week's conference in Chicago. As packed as it looks, the days fly by and its actually an exhilarating time.
I've had that sinking feeling, since I left the office on Friday, that I was forgetting something or multiple somethings. And I was. While driving home from the Symphony yesterday, I remembered that I hadn't packed current business cards. But that can't be it. There's got to be more. I'll let you know when I find out.
I've had that sinking feeling, since I left the office on Friday, that I was forgetting something or multiple somethings. And I was. While driving home from the Symphony yesterday, I remembered that I hadn't packed current business cards. But that can't be it. There's got to be more. I'll let you know when I find out.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Family History Library a Bust!
Today at lunch, I hopped on a free-zone train and road it up to Temple Square to visit the Family History Library.
I was pretty excited to dig around and see what I could find with my bio-mother's birthday in hand. I walked in and spoke with the first available clerk. I explained what I was trying to do and was kindly told that they specialize in dead people. I was also told that my search was technically illegal. I was given a website to try but I had of course already been there and came up empty handed. My next stop is going to be Library Square. From what I understand, they're connected to a national newspaper archive system.
I was pretty excited to dig around and see what I could find with my bio-mother's birthday in hand. I walked in and spoke with the first available clerk. I explained what I was trying to do and was kindly told that they specialize in dead people. I was also told that my search was technically illegal. I was given a website to try but I had of course already been there and came up empty handed. My next stop is going to be Library Square. From what I understand, they're connected to a national newspaper archive system.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
The 'Where I'm From' Document
I'm back on the hunt for my birth parents. I came across my background summary paper the other day and didn't realize the wealth of information that was in it. Take a peek...
BACKGROUND SUMMARY - JASON BRIAN KOL
Dated December 16, 1977
The young lady who gave birth to Jason was born on April 7, 1956. She was 5 feet 5 inches tall, weighed 125 pounds, had medium brown hair and blue eyes. Her national background was Dutch and German and her religious background was Reformed. She was a high school graduate and was employed in the assembly line of a local factory up until the time of her delivery.
This young lady had known the alleged father of Jason for about three years. She met him through friends in her home town. Since her pregnancy, the relationship became somewhat more sporadic. She and this young man did consider marriage at one time, bus she then realized he was not ready to settle down and therefore could be a good father to the baby. She did receive quite a bit of support from him during the pregnancy. However, during her pregnancy she was able to see him in a more realistic light and realize the faults he did have. She then was no longer interested in continuing the relationship.
This young lady continued to live at home throughout her entire pregnancy. She was from a small close knit family, and received a great deal of support from her parents during this time. She considered keeping her child for a short time because of some family pressure, but then realized the she really wanted the child to have more than she was able to give him as a single parent. She also saw her work at the factory as being a temporary thing, and hoped to further her education or find a better job sometime in the future. She was a very mature, likable 19 year old who could easily make a good future for herself.
Her parents were both life time residents of her rural home town area. Her father was 45 years old, had an eighth grade education, and had been a farmer all his life. Her mother was 40 years old, had completed two years of college, and was a housewife. This young lady's mother was herself an adopted child. The young lady also had three younger sisters and younger brother. Their ages were 18, 16, 10 and 5. Her oldest sister was also a factory worker and the three youngest were all in school. The entire family attended the Reformed Church.
The alleged father of Jason was born on March 30, 1955. He was 6 feet 1 inch tall, weighed 175 pounds, has straight reddish-blond hair, and blue eyes. He was 20 years old, and also of Dutch and German background. Although he was not attending any church at the time of this pregnancy, he was also raised in a Reformed home. This young man has a ninth grade education and was employed at a packing plant in his home town area. Together he and the young lady decided that giving up the baby for adoption would be the best thing possible for all concerned. Although he did not offer the young lady financial assistance, he was fairly supportive of her and cooperative in the release.
The young man's father was 47 years old and was employed as a street commissioner. His parents were divorced and the young man lived with his mother. She was 49 years old, had a twelfth grade education, and was employed at a factory. He had three sisters and one brother, all younger than himself. One of his sisters was married and a housewife. Another sister was also employed at a factory, and the other two siblings were both students.
As to significant health history, on the maternal side, the young lady's grandmother had diabetes. There were no other significant health problems. On the paternal side, the young man was somewhat hard of hearing and also had a brother who had problems with anemia.
Jason Brian was born on November 28, 1975 in Iowa. At birth he weighted 7 pounds 9 ounces and measured 19 inches in length. His physical exam at the time of discharge from the hospital was entirely normal. He had medium complexion, lots of dark hair, and blue eyes. He was placed in one of our agency licensed foster homes on December 2, 1975 where he continued to grow and develop normally. On January 8, 1976, Jason was transported to Grand Rapids and placed in an agency licensed foster home where after a slow adjustment period, he continued to grow and develop normally. He was examined by one of our agency pediatricians on January 16, 1976. At that time he weighted 10 pounds 14 ounces and measured 21 1/2 inches in length. Jason was placed with his parents February 19, 1976
BETHANY CHRISTIAN SERVICES
Deanna Eppinga
Caseworker
BACKGROUND SUMMARY - JASON BRIAN KOL
Dated December 16, 1977
The young lady who gave birth to Jason was born on April 7, 1956. She was 5 feet 5 inches tall, weighed 125 pounds, had medium brown hair and blue eyes. Her national background was Dutch and German and her religious background was Reformed. She was a high school graduate and was employed in the assembly line of a local factory up until the time of her delivery.
This young lady had known the alleged father of Jason for about three years. She met him through friends in her home town. Since her pregnancy, the relationship became somewhat more sporadic. She and this young man did consider marriage at one time, bus she then realized he was not ready to settle down and therefore could be a good father to the baby. She did receive quite a bit of support from him during the pregnancy. However, during her pregnancy she was able to see him in a more realistic light and realize the faults he did have. She then was no longer interested in continuing the relationship.
This young lady continued to live at home throughout her entire pregnancy. She was from a small close knit family, and received a great deal of support from her parents during this time. She considered keeping her child for a short time because of some family pressure, but then realized the she really wanted the child to have more than she was able to give him as a single parent. She also saw her work at the factory as being a temporary thing, and hoped to further her education or find a better job sometime in the future. She was a very mature, likable 19 year old who could easily make a good future for herself.
Her parents were both life time residents of her rural home town area. Her father was 45 years old, had an eighth grade education, and had been a farmer all his life. Her mother was 40 years old, had completed two years of college, and was a housewife. This young lady's mother was herself an adopted child. The young lady also had three younger sisters and younger brother. Their ages were 18, 16, 10 and 5. Her oldest sister was also a factory worker and the three youngest were all in school. The entire family attended the Reformed Church.
The alleged father of Jason was born on March 30, 1955. He was 6 feet 1 inch tall, weighed 175 pounds, has straight reddish-blond hair, and blue eyes. He was 20 years old, and also of Dutch and German background. Although he was not attending any church at the time of this pregnancy, he was also raised in a Reformed home. This young man has a ninth grade education and was employed at a packing plant in his home town area. Together he and the young lady decided that giving up the baby for adoption would be the best thing possible for all concerned. Although he did not offer the young lady financial assistance, he was fairly supportive of her and cooperative in the release.
The young man's father was 47 years old and was employed as a street commissioner. His parents were divorced and the young man lived with his mother. She was 49 years old, had a twelfth grade education, and was employed at a factory. He had three sisters and one brother, all younger than himself. One of his sisters was married and a housewife. Another sister was also employed at a factory, and the other two siblings were both students.
As to significant health history, on the maternal side, the young lady's grandmother had diabetes. There were no other significant health problems. On the paternal side, the young man was somewhat hard of hearing and also had a brother who had problems with anemia.
Jason Brian was born on November 28, 1975 in Iowa. At birth he weighted 7 pounds 9 ounces and measured 19 inches in length. His physical exam at the time of discharge from the hospital was entirely normal. He had medium complexion, lots of dark hair, and blue eyes. He was placed in one of our agency licensed foster homes on December 2, 1975 where he continued to grow and develop normally. On January 8, 1976, Jason was transported to Grand Rapids and placed in an agency licensed foster home where after a slow adjustment period, he continued to grow and develop normally. He was examined by one of our agency pediatricians on January 16, 1976. At that time he weighted 10 pounds 14 ounces and measured 21 1/2 inches in length. Jason was placed with his parents February 19, 1976
BETHANY CHRISTIAN SERVICES
Deanna Eppinga
Caseworker
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Date Night
Jason and I got to go and have a date night tonight. It was so nice and long overdue. My dad and Val came up and watched the boys while Jason and I got to go to dinner and a movie. I can't remember the last time that we have had time to ourselves without any children. We went and had mexican food then to see Bride Wars (my choice obviously) it was a fun movie and a much needed night away. Thanks Dad and Val.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Pictures
I wanted to go and have pictures taken with Noah and Ashton, today so while I was visiting my mom we decided to take the boys to kiddie kandids. I wanted some pictures with them together and separate. Ashton was not going to have anything to do with that. He freaked out he clung to me or my mom, anytime we tried to put him down. We even tried to bribe him with props but nothing worked. I finally gave up and just got pictures with Noah. Maybe someday I will get some good pictures of them together. While at my mom's house later that day I did get one picture of them together, not exactly what I had in mind but it will have to do for now.
Ashton was trying to take Noah out of the laundry basket so he could have it all to himself.
Ashton was trying to take Noah out of the laundry basket so he could have it all to himself.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Dear Clinton Administration and McCain, Deregulate Me
In a recent interview on 60 Minutes (http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/09/21/60minutes/main4463340.shtml), Scott Pelley asked McCain if he regretted that he was one of the senators that helped pass deregulation in 1999. McCain replied, "No, I think the deregulation was probably helpful to the growth of our economy." I was not only surprised by his answer but also surprised by his short response.
In 1999, the Clinton administration, along with key architects like McCain, repealed or deregulated part of the Glass-Steagall Act by enacting the Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act. The Glass-Steagall Act, which was part of the Banking Act of 1933, was designed to prevent banking activities that lead to the Great Depression. This Act was designed to "(1) maintain the integrity of the banking system; (2) prevent self-dealing on other financial abuses; and (3) limit stock market speculation" (http://digital.library.unt.edu/govdocs/crs/permalink/meta-crs-9065:1).
Yes, deregulation or minimal oversight is good for the economy but historically only pays dividends in the short term. The long-term impact has historically been disastrous. The Great Depression is an example of what can happen without regulation. We forget so soon that history repeats itself. Only 50 years later, those protections were effectively deregulated.
Other examples of deregulation that lead to disastrous outcomes include the energy industry (Enron), the savings and loan industry (The Keating Five) and financial industry (Leahman, Fannie, Freddie and Bear Stearns). All of these are powerful examples of deregulation gone horribly wrong.
I don't only believe that McCain is out of touch, I also believe that he does not have the best interests of the United States in mind. At this point, I can only speculate why he, to this day, after seeing what "his" deregulation has resulted in, still, not only supports deregulation but also believes that his decision in 1999 was prudent.
I'd like to end with an article that discusses McCain's plans to deregulate the health insurance industry (http://www.politicalaffairs.net/article/articleview/7442/).
In 1999, the Clinton administration, along with key architects like McCain, repealed or deregulated part of the Glass-Steagall Act by enacting the Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act. The Glass-Steagall Act, which was part of the Banking Act of 1933, was designed to prevent banking activities that lead to the Great Depression. This Act was designed to "(1) maintain the integrity of the banking system; (2) prevent self-dealing on other financial abuses; and (3) limit stock market speculation" (http://digital.library.unt.edu/govdocs/crs/permalink/meta-crs-9065:1).
Yes, deregulation or minimal oversight is good for the economy but historically only pays dividends in the short term. The long-term impact has historically been disastrous. The Great Depression is an example of what can happen without regulation. We forget so soon that history repeats itself. Only 50 years later, those protections were effectively deregulated.
Other examples of deregulation that lead to disastrous outcomes include the energy industry (Enron), the savings and loan industry (The Keating Five) and financial industry (Leahman, Fannie, Freddie and Bear Stearns). All of these are powerful examples of deregulation gone horribly wrong.
I don't only believe that McCain is out of touch, I also believe that he does not have the best interests of the United States in mind. At this point, I can only speculate why he, to this day, after seeing what "his" deregulation has resulted in, still, not only supports deregulation but also believes that his decision in 1999 was prudent.
I'd like to end with an article that discusses McCain's plans to deregulate the health insurance industry (http://www.politicalaffairs.net/article/articleview/7442/).
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